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Home chevron_right Crime and safety chevron_right Domestic abuse chevron_right Child to parent violence

I'm a victim of child to parent violence

If you're in immediate danger, call 999.

Police won't automatically be sent if you stay silent on a 999 phone call. If you can, cough or tap the phone to make a noise and let the operator know you're there.

If you can't do that, your call will be sent to an automated system (Silent Solutions) and you'll need to press 55 to prove that you need help. When you've pressed 55, the operator will transfer you to the police.

The police call handler will try to ask you simple yes or no questions. If you are not able to speak, listen carefully to the call handler's questions and instructions. They will assess your call and arrange help if you need it.

Child to parent violence, or adolescent to parent violence (APVA), is any behaviour used by a child or young person to control, dominate, or coerce you. It's threatening and intimidating, and can put the rest of your family at risk.

While it's normal for some adolescents to demonstrate healthy anger, conflict, or frustration as they transition between childhood and adulthood, anger should not be confused with violence. Violence is about a range of behaviours including non-physical acts aimed at achieving ongoing control over another person by instilling fear.

APVA is likely to involve a pattern of behaviour, which may include physical violence, damage to property, emotional abuse, or financial / economic abuse.

It can be difficult to admit that your child is abusive. You may feel ashamed, disappointed, and humiliated, and blame yourself for the situation. If you're a victim of APVA, help is available for both you and the child who is perpetrating the abuse.

If you're in immediate danger, or in an emergency, contact the police on 999.

If it's not an emergency, you can get support via your child's school or health professional, or your GP. You can also contact:

  • Middlesbrough Multi Agency Children's Hub by calling 01642 726004. If you need help outside of office hours, you can call 01642 524552.
  • domestic abuse charity My Sisters Place by calling 01642 241864 or emailing hello@mysistersplace.co.uk
  • Accessing Change Together by emailing accessingchangetogether@middlesbrough.gov.uk or calling 01642 726800. If you need help outside of office hours, you can call 01642 726800 and the out of hours service will help you.